Your Will Be Done

Mark Driscoll on praying “Your will be done” …

The truth is I don’t think any of us really want to pray that. I think deep down we believe we know what we want and need. And we’re not wanting God to disagree with us. Deep down, I think we really doubt whether or not God is good. And if we tell him that we think it’s okay if he does whatever he wants, he’ll fail us. He’ll hurt us. He won’t take care of us. Being a pastor gives you a front row seat to the most devastated moments of people’s lives. And they always want you to pray. What do you pray? Well I told you it’s two things. You pray your desires and your will be done. It’s devastating. Sin is real. Death is real. Evil is real. Injustice is real. Pain is real. Abandonment and betrayal. Suffering. All real. Christianity is not a religion that necessarily gets you around it. It’s a relationship with God that gets you through it.

Things you should try out sometime soon: drinking beer in a random person’s huge home while watching a seasoned pro play gritty guitar riffs and sing songs from his yet to be released album. That’s exactly what I did this past Monday.  The lead singer of Califone (one of Kyle’s favorite bands) was embarking on a living room tour of the States. The idea is to visit homes of fans and invite a small crowd of people for an intimate evening of beer and music. And Kyle, being the music fiend that he is, was able to buy tickets for us to go.  After a quick drive through Baltimore, we pulled up to this beautiful, old home and I was actually feeling a little nervous. Was it going to be fun? Was it going to be awkward? Are we going to fit in with all these cool people? As we got out of the car and walked to the door, we met Scott, a longhaired middle aged dude who seemed famous in his own right, and I realized that we ourselves were now part of the cool kids club. The three of us walked in together (power in numbers, right?) and kicked the night off with a cold beer and introductions to a crowd of people.  After small talk (What’s your name, where do you work, where are you from, how did you hear about this evening), we all filtered into the living room. The set was small and modest, unassuming: a few chairs, a line of four guitars, and a piano set against a window looking out onto green. Around 8, Tim started playing and it was immediately magical. I closed my eyes and breathed in. The music, the setting of the sun behind the large windows, the beer that was loosening my mind, and Kyle sitting close next to me… if only every Monday could feel like that.  Lately, I’m realizing that I live a pretty cool life. I don’t mean to sound entitled, but it’s slowly becoming a life I am proud of. I read great books, eat at delicious restaurants, go to museums and parties, travel to New York on a whim, and hang out in someone’s house on a Monday evening listening to Califone. It’s almost like I’ve missed out on all the amazing things I’ve been doing because I’ve been so hungry for the next experience. Maybe it’s just where I’m at in life or who I’m with now, but it’s all coming together for me. The big picture is finally a little less blurry and more filled with musical Mondays, a warm hand on mine, and a drive home giddy from a musical, spiritual experience. 
Zoom Info
Things you should try out sometime soon: drinking beer in a random person’s huge home while watching a seasoned pro play gritty guitar riffs and sing songs from his yet to be released album. That’s exactly what I did this past Monday.  The lead singer of Califone (one of Kyle’s favorite bands) was embarking on a living room tour of the States. The idea is to visit homes of fans and invite a small crowd of people for an intimate evening of beer and music. And Kyle, being the music fiend that he is, was able to buy tickets for us to go.  After a quick drive through Baltimore, we pulled up to this beautiful, old home and I was actually feeling a little nervous. Was it going to be fun? Was it going to be awkward? Are we going to fit in with all these cool people? As we got out of the car and walked to the door, we met Scott, a longhaired middle aged dude who seemed famous in his own right, and I realized that we ourselves were now part of the cool kids club. The three of us walked in together (power in numbers, right?) and kicked the night off with a cold beer and introductions to a crowd of people.  After small talk (What’s your name, where do you work, where are you from, how did you hear about this evening), we all filtered into the living room. The set was small and modest, unassuming: a few chairs, a line of four guitars, and a piano set against a window looking out onto green. Around 8, Tim started playing and it was immediately magical. I closed my eyes and breathed in. The music, the setting of the sun behind the large windows, the beer that was loosening my mind, and Kyle sitting close next to me… if only every Monday could feel like that.  Lately, I’m realizing that I live a pretty cool life. I don’t mean to sound entitled, but it’s slowly becoming a life I am proud of. I read great books, eat at delicious restaurants, go to museums and parties, travel to New York on a whim, and hang out in someone’s house on a Monday evening listening to Califone. It’s almost like I’ve missed out on all the amazing things I’ve been doing because I’ve been so hungry for the next experience. Maybe it’s just where I’m at in life or who I’m with now, but it’s all coming together for me. The big picture is finally a little less blurry and more filled with musical Mondays, a warm hand on mine, and a drive home giddy from a musical, spiritual experience. 
Zoom Info

Things you should try out sometime soon: drinking beer in a random person’s huge home while watching a seasoned pro play gritty guitar riffs and sing songs from his yet to be released album.

That’s exactly what I did this past Monday. 

The lead singer of Califone (one of Kyle’s favorite bands) was embarking on a living room tour of the States. The idea is to visit homes of fans and invite a small crowd of people for an intimate evening of beer and music. And Kyle, being the music fiend that he is, was able to buy tickets for us to go. 

After a quick drive through Baltimore, we pulled up to this beautiful, old home and I was actually feeling a little nervous. Was it going to be fun? Was it going to be awkward? Are we going to fit in with all these cool people? As we got out of the car and walked to the door, we met Scott, a longhaired middle aged dude who seemed famous in his own right, and I realized that we ourselves were now part of the cool kids club. The three of us walked in together (power in numbers, right?) and kicked the night off with a cold beer and introductions to a crowd of people. 

After small talk (What’s your name, where do you work, where are you from, how did you hear about this evening), we all filtered into the living room. The set was small and modest, unassuming: a few chairs, a line of four guitars, and a piano set against a window looking out onto green.

Around 8, Tim started playing and it was immediately magical. I closed my eyes and breathed in. The music, the setting of the sun behind the large windows, the beer that was loosening my mind, and Kyle sitting close next to me… if only every Monday could feel like that. 

Lately, I’m realizing that I live a pretty cool life. I don’t mean to sound entitled, but it’s slowly becoming a life I am proud of. I read great books, eat at delicious restaurants, go to museums and parties, travel to New York on a whim, and hang out in someone’s house on a Monday evening listening to Califone. It’s almost like I’ve missed out on all the amazing things I’ve been doing because I’ve been so hungry for the next experience.

Maybe it’s just where I’m at in life or who I’m with now, but it’s all coming together for me. The big picture is finally a little less blurry and more filled with musical Mondays, a warm hand on mine, and a drive home giddy from a musical, spiritual experience. 

Well

How are you

she asks.

-

How are you

she repeats.

Her voice sounds strange.

Foreign to her,

And she hears her mother

Or her lover

In her vocal chords.

Whiny. 

Small.

It is not of her.

-

How are you

she asks.

-

The answer lingers

And then flutters away

Like the last flicker 

Of a candle flame.

On the tip of a tongue

But then battered away.

-

She thinks,

how are you?

-

She listens to the cry

Of the guitar strings

As the fingers slide.

The song drifts

and then dies.

-

How are you. 

Really.

-

She can’t face that

her reflection doesn’t know

the answer to 

this simple query.

-

Well.

She is, I am not well. 

Daughter has continually proved to be one of my favorite musicians of the last year. She released a full length album recently and it’s perfectly somber, with soft and playful rhythms, drumbeats, and sticky guitar riffs. 

Here’s one of my favorite tracks from the album. You’d be amiss to not check the entire thing out. Wait until late, when you are wide away but the rest of the world is sleeping, with a glass of wine in hand and a journal to pen, to listen to it in its entirety. 

Source: Spotify

Yesterday was one of those most perfect days. Ya know, the ones where time just stands still, the sun isn’t too hot, and the company is effortless. Do you ever have those?  Well yesterday, you were it.  Kyle and I went adventuring to DC yesterday. My purse was full of books (just in case we wanted to plop down on the Mall and read until our eyes were sore) and my head was full of song. We metro’d in, which is charming in and of itself (if you can ignore the weird stains on the carpet) and arrived at L’Enfant Plaza ready to take on the Hirshhorn Museum of Modern Art.  We walked in, and after a quick purse check (“Sorry about all the books, ma’am”), we became wide-eyed little kids in a mansion of things we weren’t allowed to touch. It was all wonderfully quirky and strange and beautiful… but my favorite was the Clyfford Still room. Giant abstract expressionist paintings… ugh. Le swoon. Le major swoon. I loved them so much, I decided that I’m going to try to duplicate them on my own (on a much smaller scale, of course). After walking in circles for an hour or two, taking in giant paintings and tiny sculptures, it was time to EAT. Oh.my.goodness, was it time to EAT! We headed up Pennsylvania Avenue (by metro, not by foot, because we are lazy) to Founding Farmers.  We’ve been meaning to go there ever since Kyle got a new job. It was supposed to be a celebratory dinner, but instead it turned into a “hey-so-glad-you-are-doing-so-great-in-your-new-job” dinner. Regardless, it was BANGIN’. We had cornbread with actual pieces of corn (who knew?!), a burger with these delicious, tangy sauce, and hot dogs with a variety of toppings. Sounds boring, but you guys… these weren’t just any burgers or hot dogs… they were oddly down home and gourmet at the same time.  *Cue tummy rumbling* After stuffing our faces and sipping on classy cocktails, we headed back home. After an hour on the metro and a half hour in the car, we finally got home, perfectly tired and ready to chill.  We celebrated our day out with a bit of reading and a FRIENDS marathon. Spoiler alert… Rachel’s having a baby!  Oh, yesterday, you were just too wonderful. I didn’t want to fall asleep because I knew I’d miss you. You seemed but a dream. 
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Yesterday was one of those most perfect days. Ya know, the ones where time just stands still, the sun isn’t too hot, and the company is effortless. Do you ever have those? 

Well yesterday, you were it. 

Kyle and I went adventuring to DC yesterday. My purse was full of books (just in case we wanted to plop down on the Mall and read until our eyes were sore) and my head was full of song. We metro’d in, which is charming in and of itself (if you can ignore the weird stains on the carpet) and arrived at L’Enfant Plaza ready to take on the Hirshhorn Museum of Modern Art. 

We walked in, and after a quick purse check (“Sorry about all the books, ma’am”), we became wide-eyed little kids in a mansion of things we weren’t allowed to touch. It was all wonderfully quirky and strange and beautiful… but my favorite was the Clyfford Still room. Giant abstract expressionist paintings… ugh. Le swoon. Le major swoon. I loved them so much, I decided that I’m going to try to duplicate them on my own (on a much smaller scale, of course).

After walking in circles for an hour or two, taking in giant paintings and tiny sculptures, it was time to EAT. Oh.my.goodness, was it time to EAT! We headed up Pennsylvania Avenue (by metro, not by foot, because we are lazy) to Founding Farmers. 

We’ve been meaning to go there ever since Kyle got a new job. It was supposed to be a celebratory dinner, but instead it turned into a “hey-so-glad-you-are-doing-so-great-in-your-new-job” dinner. Regardless, it was BANGIN’. We had cornbread with actual pieces of corn (who knew?!), a burger with these delicious, tangy sauce, and hot dogs with a variety of toppings. Sounds boring, but you guys… these weren’t just any burgers or hot dogs… they were oddly down home and gourmet at the same time. 

*Cue tummy rumbling*

After stuffing our faces and sipping on classy cocktails, we headed back home. After an hour on the metro and a half hour in the car, we finally got home, perfectly tired and ready to chill. 

We celebrated our day out with a bit of reading and a FRIENDS marathon. Spoiler alert… Rachel’s having a baby! 

Oh, yesterday, you were just too wonderful. I didn’t want to fall asleep because I knew I’d miss you. You seemed but a dream. 

Weekend Excursion… according to my iPhone.  ———————- This past weekend, I tagged along with my good friends Rachel and Colleen to New York City and Virginia. Rachel had two gigs, so Colleen and I were here roadies. Life on the road… how glamorous!  I jest, but it was an amazing time. I die for New York… the shopping, the people, the smells (mostly ew), and the aura of the city. It has such a strong heartbeat. You just get drawn in! And Virginia… ugh! After a whirlwind of a city (less than 24 hours in NYC), we headed down to Virginia and sipped on chilled wine while Rachel played a 3 hour set of covers… twas magical.  Now it is back to real life in Maryland, and it figures that it’d start raining for three days right when I get back. Welcome home, right? 
Zoom Info
Weekend Excursion… according to my iPhone.  ———————- This past weekend, I tagged along with my good friends Rachel and Colleen to New York City and Virginia. Rachel had two gigs, so Colleen and I were here roadies. Life on the road… how glamorous!  I jest, but it was an amazing time. I die for New York… the shopping, the people, the smells (mostly ew), and the aura of the city. It has such a strong heartbeat. You just get drawn in! And Virginia… ugh! After a whirlwind of a city (less than 24 hours in NYC), we headed down to Virginia and sipped on chilled wine while Rachel played a 3 hour set of covers… twas magical.  Now it is back to real life in Maryland, and it figures that it’d start raining for three days right when I get back. Welcome home, right? 
Zoom Info
Weekend Excursion… according to my iPhone.  ———————- This past weekend, I tagged along with my good friends Rachel and Colleen to New York City and Virginia. Rachel had two gigs, so Colleen and I were here roadies. Life on the road… how glamorous!  I jest, but it was an amazing time. I die for New York… the shopping, the people, the smells (mostly ew), and the aura of the city. It has such a strong heartbeat. You just get drawn in! And Virginia… ugh! After a whirlwind of a city (less than 24 hours in NYC), we headed down to Virginia and sipped on chilled wine while Rachel played a 3 hour set of covers… twas magical.  Now it is back to real life in Maryland, and it figures that it’d start raining for three days right when I get back. Welcome home, right? 
Zoom Info
Weekend Excursion… according to my iPhone.  ———————- This past weekend, I tagged along with my good friends Rachel and Colleen to New York City and Virginia. Rachel had two gigs, so Colleen and I were here roadies. Life on the road… how glamorous!  I jest, but it was an amazing time. I die for New York… the shopping, the people, the smells (mostly ew), and the aura of the city. It has such a strong heartbeat. You just get drawn in! And Virginia… ugh! After a whirlwind of a city (less than 24 hours in NYC), we headed down to Virginia and sipped on chilled wine while Rachel played a 3 hour set of covers… twas magical.  Now it is back to real life in Maryland, and it figures that it’d start raining for three days right when I get back. Welcome home, right? 
Zoom Info
Weekend Excursion… according to my iPhone.  ———————- This past weekend, I tagged along with my good friends Rachel and Colleen to New York City and Virginia. Rachel had two gigs, so Colleen and I were here roadies. Life on the road… how glamorous!  I jest, but it was an amazing time. I die for New York… the shopping, the people, the smells (mostly ew), and the aura of the city. It has such a strong heartbeat. You just get drawn in! And Virginia… ugh! After a whirlwind of a city (less than 24 hours in NYC), we headed down to Virginia and sipped on chilled wine while Rachel played a 3 hour set of covers… twas magical.  Now it is back to real life in Maryland, and it figures that it’d start raining for three days right when I get back. Welcome home, right? 
Zoom Info
Weekend Excursion… according to my iPhone.  ———————- This past weekend, I tagged along with my good friends Rachel and Colleen to New York City and Virginia. Rachel had two gigs, so Colleen and I were here roadies. Life on the road… how glamorous!  I jest, but it was an amazing time. I die for New York… the shopping, the people, the smells (mostly ew), and the aura of the city. It has such a strong heartbeat. You just get drawn in! And Virginia… ugh! After a whirlwind of a city (less than 24 hours in NYC), we headed down to Virginia and sipped on chilled wine while Rachel played a 3 hour set of covers… twas magical.  Now it is back to real life in Maryland, and it figures that it’d start raining for three days right when I get back. Welcome home, right? 
Zoom Info
Weekend Excursion… according to my iPhone.  ———————- This past weekend, I tagged along with my good friends Rachel and Colleen to New York City and Virginia. Rachel had two gigs, so Colleen and I were here roadies. Life on the road… how glamorous!  I jest, but it was an amazing time. I die for New York… the shopping, the people, the smells (mostly ew), and the aura of the city. It has such a strong heartbeat. You just get drawn in! And Virginia… ugh! After a whirlwind of a city (less than 24 hours in NYC), we headed down to Virginia and sipped on chilled wine while Rachel played a 3 hour set of covers… twas magical.  Now it is back to real life in Maryland, and it figures that it’d start raining for three days right when I get back. Welcome home, right? 
Zoom Info
Weekend Excursion… according to my iPhone.  ———————- This past weekend, I tagged along with my good friends Rachel and Colleen to New York City and Virginia. Rachel had two gigs, so Colleen and I were here roadies. Life on the road… how glamorous!  I jest, but it was an amazing time. I die for New York… the shopping, the people, the smells (mostly ew), and the aura of the city. It has such a strong heartbeat. You just get drawn in! And Virginia… ugh! After a whirlwind of a city (less than 24 hours in NYC), we headed down to Virginia and sipped on chilled wine while Rachel played a 3 hour set of covers… twas magical.  Now it is back to real life in Maryland, and it figures that it’d start raining for three days right when I get back. Welcome home, right? 
Zoom Info

Weekend Excursion… according to my iPhone. 

———————-

This past weekend, I tagged along with my good friends Rachel and Colleen to New York City and Virginia. Rachel had two gigs, so Colleen and I were here roadies. Life on the road… how glamorous! 

I jest, but it was an amazing time. I die for New York… the shopping, the people, the smells (mostly ew), and the aura of the city. It has such a strong heartbeat. You just get drawn in! And Virginia… ugh! After a whirlwind of a city (less than 24 hours in NYC), we headed down to Virginia and sipped on chilled wine while Rachel played a 3 hour set of covers… twas magical. 

Now it is back to real life in Maryland, and it figures that it’d start raining for three days right when I get back. Welcome home, right?